I am 1 in 8 - My Infertility Struggle

September 13, 2015

I know this blog isn't about bridal or weddings and some of you might be wondering why you would find an infertility post on a bridal shop's website. I wanted to sit down and write to my brides and to all women about a few personal things about me.  

 

I was 18 years old when I was diagnosed with Gonadal Dysgenesis Type XX. All that means is that I was born without ovaries, fallopian tubes, or eggs. I was only born with a uterus. 

 

When I was growing up with this, I had no one to talk to. I had no support group or outlet. I want to share my journey with you all because I want to bring awareness to infertility. I want you all to share in my story and I hope it encourages and inspires some of you out there. 

 

I have had several doctors tell me, "You'll never have a baby." and "You should never try IVF." I've had doctors laugh at me when they found out I didn't have ovaries. I went from living in Portland, OR and flying into Mayo Clinic for them to tell me, "You'll be a human pin cushion." 

 

After many years of hearing this, I had it in my head that we need to adopt or find a surrogate. I told myself that I would never get pregnant. I went for another opinion and they acted like it was no big deal. I saw another doctor and again, they said I am a perfect candidate for donor egg IVF. 

 

I got it out of my head that I would never be pregnant. Now that I'm about to hopefully become pregnant, it still isn't real that it actually could happen. 

 

I am now 31 and am about to begin IVF. My husband and I have been on a waiting list for donor eggs since March. I received a phone call on August 31st that they have found us an annonymous donor. It was the best news I could get. And it also happened on our 2 year anniversary. A flood of emotions came over me. I was nervous, excited, scared, and grateful. 

 

A complete stranger is going to put herself through so much pain and agony to help me. Her ovaries will bruise. She will endure painful shots. How do you ever thank them? She is giving up part of herself to help us have a family. It's an overwhelming feeling. 

 

Donor 512 is 5'4" with brown hair and brown eyes. She has a small dancers body and cheek bones similar to mine. She enjoys hockey (she's from MN so it's a given), working out, and spending time with family. She's perfect. 

 

We accepted her earlier this week and I was put on my IVF schedule. Next week I start birth control pills and we cycle with Donor 512. When I'm at International Bridal Market in NYC, I start taking my lupron shots. I'll have a few ultrasounds and by the first week of November, they will retrieve her eggs. We are hoping to transfer 2 embryo's by the second week of November. 

 

My girls are amazing and they are all excited to be on this journey with us. Flutter will continue to run as usual and hopefully one day it won't be my only baby! 

 

I couldn't be doing any of this without my amazing husband and family. If you want to follow my journey, I have a special blog you can follow - We Seek Our Great Perhaps. 

 

Keep us in your thoughts and I couldn't be happier! 

 

xoxo 

Kolby 

 

 Jake and Kolby

 

 

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